Idk


I don't know what to do anymore.

I don't know how to tell anyone at my school that I'm so miserable I've had a mental breakdown after 4 months.

I don't know how to tell them that the kids are so misbehaved it gave me a stomach ulcer.

I don't know how to tell them that the way they treat their Special Needs kids makes me nauseated.

I don't know how to tell them that if I didn't have kittens that needed me to survive, I would have left.

I don't know what to say because I know they don't listen to me anyway.

Reporting what happened before just made it worse and nobody really did anything or helped. I went right to my PoE and saw nothing of it.

I'm pretty sure they don't want to deal with me since I dropped out of the super important project we had to do. I didn't know how to tell them it was because the school didn't help me even when I needed it and it was an impossible task to have done with my situation.

I have no idea how to open the door to all these problems and the stress that's been going on.

I vented in the thread about this but in the last 4 months of being at this school, I have had:


  • A student headbutt me in the spine resulting in me getting a spinal injury,
  • A pair of students walking behind me in the hall sniggering and whispering before one of them planted her hands square in the middle of my back and shoved me-- resulting in them laughing at me when I stumbled forward,
  • A student grab me by my ponytail while I was rearranging books on the bottom shelf and pull me toward the computer firmly because I told them no when asked to unlock my PC.
  • A pair of students repeatedly Frisbee the bathroom sign into my room, bonus with post-blood nose tissue.
  • A student post up to me like he was going to punch me because I tried to take his phone away after asking him 5 times to put it away.
  • Students push me/body bump me off my PC more times than I can count (easy to do since I stand) so they can close my tabs/projects that are open.
  • Edit: completely forgot about the random student who barged into my room, sat down on my desk and interrogated me in Korean after I got back from the hospital until I opened up Google Translate, in which she called me a bitter worker and asked me why I don't go back to my own country. Fun girl, that one.
Telling them what the students are doing just resulted in defense of the kids.
"They're just curious about you." "they're just kids." "It's not a problem." It IS a problem! I'm telling you it's a problem! Right now! In front of you!

Since I reported to the PoE, teachers treat me differently. Turning around when I walk into a room, or leaving when I show up, not saying goodbye or hello to me anymore, just making me feel like I'm diseased. I'd rather they yell at me than show such silent disdain, it hurts more to feel like I'm a leper than a bitch.

I've made friends, I've gotten new hobbies, I've explored Korea, I've tried new foods, I've read a dozen books, I've saved 6 cats. I've done what I'm supposed to do and I'm still so profoundly unhappy here.

I don't want to do a midnight run, I worked so so hard to be here, I put everything I had on the line to come to Korea.

I don't want quitting to be my last option, but I can't see another way out that doesn't put my future at risk.

Comments

  1. Hi Winter. I stumbled upon your blog and I just want to say I feel for you. You really got the short straw in your experiences. I don't know what advice to offer but if you need a friend Im happy to be one.
    I am also a NET and have been in Korea for roughly the same time as you. Whereabouts in Korea are you? I hope your situation improves.

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